Work in Progress

june ramadan 2016

Ramadan 2016, beginning

This month, let say it’s an obsession or merely hysteria. In an effort of always trying and looking for some better things to do, I have experimented with new and the latest thing around WordPress. Searching for ways to revamp a blog, including, but not limited to, tinkering with the SEO thingy. Perhaps, it just another meaningless act of personal justification. A painstaking mess and lingering headaches coding and HTML. Anyhow, after all, that effort, the blog in my opinion, still appears lack of something, it is not looking decent enough to pass the bar and remarkably dull. To put it another way, I think it still needs time to progress further to become a more refine, advance, and rather enchanting blog.*

*note-to-self; a smooth way for a self-personification, correlating yourself to a blog, smooth mix DJ!

This month, which is a holy month for Muslims everywhere. Ramadan is the ninth month in the Islāmic calendar. Muslims are obliged to fast during daylight to commemorate the first revelation of the Quran to Muhammad. CMIIW (correct me if I am wrong) On separate occasions this month, I have shown up at a couple of social gatherings. Seems normal at first, however, at the same time fell flat. Having a get-together tradition during Iftar or breakfasting seems somehow so futile and hollow. Just wait until Eid Mubarak celebration, those people will gather around once more for what called “Halal-Bi-Halal”*

*side note: It is indeed from Arabic, but it’s wrong in Arabic grammar rules. The closest translation for it, in Indonesian is “Silaturahmi” which another way of saying “yet, another social gathering.” And importantly, is a customary unique only to Indonesian, as no other Muslim country does it, as far as I am aware. CMIIW.

Ramadan 2016, different

Honestly, this year Ramadan did not feel like anything special. It seems like any typical month choke-full of common courtesy and known religion slashes cultural rituals. I’m not faithfully practising it not just because I’m an Agnostic. Be that as it may, this year feels particularly different. Well, at least nothing positive or worthy of mentioning.

“It is one of the great tragedies of life, something always changes.” House, M.D.

What is it that exactly felt different about this year Ramadan? Quoting my favourite Doctor House “it is one of the great tragedies of life, something always changes.” In life, troubles always find you from left and right. Take a look on the economy side, sales are not doing great lately and have been going on from early this year. I tried. However, it seems I am always running away from all of it instead of towards it. Even though it also involving personal savings, I don’t attend that well, feels more like an obligation. I don’t know, couldn’t even find the right adjective. It is a sizeable figure. As a consequence, if it is not working, I actually could wind up with a hefty loss.

Furthermore, from the personal side of things, well, a lot of known issues here likewise. Been here awhile, I just do what I always do best, run, Hajar, run. Need to deal with all of it eventually. Nonetheless, I find myself always reasoning and couldn’t ever find the right time to head on with it. An excellent example of real procrastination at its best.*

*another note-to-self; you might want to close your ear on this, not to worries, it address only to me, but d*mn you!)

Ramadan 2016, football

Also on what happen in this year Ramadan, it coincidentally at the same month with the European football celebration happening once every four years. The UEFA Euro 2016 ⚽️. Where selected countries in Europe compete in matches to decide which country, essentially is better in playing with balls ⚽️⚽️. So, the football fever is catching on and has been since my short stint in the UK. (A fan before, but not too much into it) Additionally, the match mostly happens at the same time when Muslims in Jakarta are doing “Sahoor” or pre-dawn meal before fasting. As a direct result of that, my sleeping pattern now likes a security guard doing double shifts at the same time.

Moreover, together with football matches,  #Euro2016  comes betting temptation. My iMac screen is becoming more and more like a computer in New York Stocks Exchange. Filled with graphs, results, predictions, past match data, and so on. Like dating, my betting doesn’t necessarily have all the luck in the world, full of false-positive feelings and horribly gone wrong predictions. Even after all the much analysis, lady-luck is still leaving me with mounting debts to pay to the dealer, arguably, that is also the exciting part. All the frustration and joy, emotions flowing while watching the match. (C’mon, England!) (updated; Bye, England)

Ramadan 2016, almost ending

Another year, another Ramadan come and swiftly, almost reaching the end. For some people, a festive month full of hopes, joy, and celebrations. For another, mostly feeling gloomy, miserable, and dispassionate month like any other month this year. With all the dark burdening feelings around, I find myself in need of an outlet, channelling all pent-up emotions, emotions, sadness, and anger. Writing, for me, is like a cold sweaty ice of “Tehbotol Sosro” after fasting all day long. There was a time when it considers a challenge to have a diary when you are a guy teenager, and it’s equal to Barbie doll; I might say, trust me on this one. Not joking, seriously  #scarredforlife  However, childhood trauma aside, now thanks to the internet, even if it means a constant struggle with WordPress. I could happily write anything random, again. The downside is, because not enough excitement and blissful moments these days, hence the ominous writing style.

Have an enjoyable and meaningful Ramadan everyone.

Hajar, 22 June 2016

Ramadan 2016
keep progressing

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